The further away I get from NECC, the more I see.  The specific conversations that I had, from the time I sat down at the web 2.0 smackdown at Saturday’s Edubloggercon, to the last conversation I had in the elevator the night before I left are all starting to weave themselves into this tapestry of voices.  It’s all coming together for me, and I am realizing that every conversation I had leads me to one question in my own mind…what will I do?  The whole idea that teaching needs a good kick in the pants is really not up for debate, though I must say I heard a few.  What I did not hear, is a lot of solutions.  Who has the answer for that?  What exactly does the everyday, teach between the bells teacher do to impact the future of education?  Yes, we talked alot about what is wrong, and what we don’t have, and what we don’t do.  I just want to know, what should I do?  How can I help?  I suppose I wanted someone to come over to me at the bloggers cafe and just answer that question for me…lay it out and tell me to run with it.  But I realized about 2 days into the deal, that we were all just really in the same boat, rowing the same direction, not really knowing how to get where we need to go.  So, I started asking some people..”what should we do, what can we do?”  I had some great conversations about that- I talked to Bernie Dodge about my struggles with using webquests in a student-centered, constructivist classroom, and how I could balance those things.  I talked with Tina Steele, Kevin Honeycutt, and Wes Fryer about how we needed to take advantage of our geographic proximity and make something great happen in our little corner of the world.  I talked to Riptide Furse about my ideas for a new kind of technology training model for teachers.  Those, and many other conversations are all mashing up together in my head, and I am beginning to see what I will do.  I spent the last hour creating a model for change, and tomorrow, I will share those ideas with my tech person, and my principal.  Then, if they don’t fire me, I’ll share them with you….well…I’ll share them with you anyway:)  I was beginning to think that all of my social networking (fun as it was)  at NECC had not really produced anything tangible.  Now I see..the powerful force of my network.  Thanks to all of you!!  Also.. to Jeff, Will, Jakes, Shareski, Wagner, and the others in Utecht cafe that morning, who let me just listen for awhile- made an effort to say hello to a newbie, and let me toss a few ideas-thanks-it was empowering to me.

Tanner, my son,  and I have similar personalities I think.  We are both outgoing and like to be around other people, most of the time.  Sometimes, though, he gets overwhelmed by the amount of chaos and chatter, and just disappears for awhile.  One year I remember we were opening Christmas presents, and there was alot of noise and people and stuff, and I looked around to see if he was soaking in this moment, and he was gone.  I found him in a back bedroom, hiding under a small table.  He was not sad or upset, he just needed a quiet place to escape.  There was just too much going on, and he took the time to step back and re-group.  Wise child, that son of mine.

So, why do I start a post about NECC with this story?  Well, I have had a surprising reaction to my upcoming trip to NECC, and I have been “hiding under the table” for a few weeks trying to re-group.  I am usually so excited in the weeks before a big conference.  I have been looking forward to meeting people face to face for the first time, hearing people present for the first time, continuing to make connections with people, learning new things that I can come back and share with my students.  I am usually driving people crazy by now because all I can talk about is my trip to (insert event here).    I don’t know why it is not that way for me right now. 

I am, perhaps, overwhelmed by the sheer amount of information and choices that are available.  I want to get online and finalize my schedule, but there are too many things that I want to see, and they all happen at the same time.  Then you factor in the unplugged events, leave a bit of time for bloggers cafe, and next thing you know I am headed back under the table again!  I have appreciated reading others thoughts about how to “do” NECC.  I have resisted signing up for some things like the twitter dinner, simply because I don’t want to schedule my entire time and feel obligated to be somewhere.  I almost feel like I have skipped a step in my evolution as a learner.  I wish I was going into NECC a bit less connected.  I wish I wasn’t aware of all of these events that I so want to attend.  I feel like perhaps I would enjoy NECC more if I knew less at this point.  I just want to wander around, soak it all in, and not wonder about who is at bloggers cafe, or what dinner I am missing.  Is that wrong?  I am sure by the time NECC rolls around, I will have this all settled in my own mind, and be totally excited and ready for whatever NECC has to offer- so look for me, say hello..but… if you can’t find me, start looking under the tables:)